Final Thoughts

It is currently March 7th, 2022 at 11:00 p.m. I have just uploaded my last vlog for this project, and honestly, I feel free.

When I first started this project, I was confident that I would be able to change my social media habits. I envisioned myself breaking my bad social media habits, feeling content and empowered by my daily posts, and curating a healthy feed that dispelled feelings of inadequacy and fostered connection. But for me, The Social Experiment proved to be anything but that.

Initially, I was planning on posting content on either Tik Tok, Instagram, or Twitter each day. I was going to record myself daily, documenting the trials and tribulations that came with being a full-time social media poster as well as reflecting on how I could improve my habits surrounding social media use. This would include finding ways to lower my screen time, unfollowing toxic accounts, and letting go of the anxiety that prevented me from posting. Instead, I fell into the trap of social media. I had to stop myself from hours of doom scrolling, felt so much pressure to post for the project that I ended up barely creating content, and did nothing to expunge my feed from accounts that promoted unrealistic health and beauty expectations.

After hours and hours of filming myself, fretting over whether my content was good enough, and editing my vlogs, I reached a breaking point. I became so hyper-aware and self-conscious of everything that I said and did outside of the social media realm that I broke down. I originally was planning to film another series of vlogs summarizing my findings with professional lighting, cameras, and sound, but my self-esteem had reached an all-time low. I knew that if I had to suffer through another 10+ hours of editing myself, over-analyzing my body, my voice, and every little mannerism, I would fall back into my anorexic-bulimic tendencies. Before I took part in this experiment, I was content with how I looked, how I presented myself, and my lack of social media use. Now, I am suffering from body dysmorphia after having been in remission for three years, I can’t stand to look at pictures of myself, and I have had to cut back on social media almost entirely. Even so, I still stand by my view that social media is neither good nor bad.

While I may not be in the healthiest place mentally after my experiment, I realize that I am responsible for this. I am a talented writer, and when I have edited multimedia, I was not editing footage of myself. A few years ago, I vlogged myself doing challenges, but I had an editor that saved me the time and energy from having to go back and look at myself for hours on end. I didn’t realize how much having an editor saved my mental health, and had I hired one for this project, I think I would be in a different and better position.

For the longest time, I thought that I wanted to be a content creator or influencer on social media; the vloggers on YouTube made me feel like I always had a friend to keep me company on my loneliest days, and I looked forward to their uploads on the social media platforms they were active on. About one year ago, my favorite content creator, Jenna Marbles, unexpectedly quit YouTube, her main social media platform, as well as Instagram, and Twitter. Jenna had amassed 20 million followers over the course of 10 years and did not miss a weekly upload during the time she was active on YouTube. She also edited all of her videos herself - all 520 videos. She also had a podcast channel that she co-edited with her fiance, Julien Solmenita, which included 284 episodes. At first, I along with the rest of the world were heartbroken, confused, and at a loss. How could this creator who only ever spread love and positivity and had virtually no hate comments give up something she loved for so long? Well, I can say that after doing this experiment for a mere three months, I completely understand why Jenna quit. Imagine putting yourself out there every week for a majority of your young adulthood for the sole purpose of entertaining others. On top of that, imagine then trying to make the next video better than the one previous, and you are the one in charge of editing yourself for the public eye to view, only be criticized for everything you say and do - and that is your full-time job. I have a newfound respect for content creators and influencers, for their craft is much harder than it seems.

Despite not coming out as the invigorated, well-balanced social media user and creator I had envisioned going into this project, I have still discovered ways in which one can healthily navigate social media. I cannot say that these are conclusions for everybody as this is a sample of one, but I believe that my experiences indicate findings and can be further explored. The following is a list of strategies I found helped me the most during The Social Experiment:

When I catch yourself in a thought loop, Cotruzulla (2019) writes that taking part in physical activities and setting timers to help regain control by replacing the activity you’re doing with a new one that makes you feel in control. Setting app limits, like in vlog 12, helped me to not doom scroll as much as it snapped me out of my trance-like state.
Psychologist Jay Rai (2021) writes that checking your phone first thing in the morning forces your body to go from the delta, stage, or deep sleep stage, to being wide awake, or the delta stage. As a result, your brain is primed for distraction and has exhausted its dopamine. In vlog 5, I felt more productive than I had in days because I didn’t check my phone immediately when I woke up. I was inconsistent in making this a habit, but when I did put it into practice, my mood was heightened and I didn’t procrastinate.
In their recent studies, Instagram reported that taking away “likes” had little effect on behavior and mental wellbeing (Criddle, 2021). However, I found that taking away the “like” function in vlog 8 was freeing and helped me with my issues of comparing myself to others.

But the most important lesson that I took away from The Social Experiment was that I am more than my social media platform. I am not defined by the likes and comments on a post that captures a mere moment of my life. My follower count is not a reflection of my popularity or social currency, and my overall like-count does not reflect whom I am truly loved by. I don’t believe that social media is all good or all bad - I think it can be both. The social media landscape is fun, hurtful, exciting, anxiety-inducing, and so many other contrasting characteristics. The question is, what will you do to make social media the best experience for you?